If you are a Band of Brothers lover, you might recognize that my title is in reference to it. The Day of Days was the episode where the paratroopers jumped out of their planes to battle at Normandy. Craziness! I had heard the term "paratrooper" before, but until watching this incredibly good, 10 year old miniseries, I never knew that a paratrooper was someone who jumped out of a plane with all their gear and weapons, directly into combat on foot. Wowsa. That WWII was something else.
Anyway, today is my "day of days". Bit dramatic to compare it to an event such as D-Day, I realize. But I'm not doing so well about this day.
At 1pm today I'll go to the hospital for my surgery. I'm guessing that means the surgery itself will be at 3ish.
I am beyond nervous. It is a 2 hour surgery - what is he doing in there for two hours?!
Everyone is telling me I'll be fine and there will be no complications. I should believe that. The surgeon says he has done this over 1000 times. But when is the last time we have done ANYTHING without complications?
The last three surgeries I have had have been the loss of a baby, the prevention of the loss of two more babies, and the birth of two babies who were far too young to be born (I've had two more - tubes in my ears and wisdom teeth extraction, but I don't really count those). Although all of those surgeries went "well" (considering the circumstances) me and surgery don't have a very good track record for happy times.
What if something goes wrong? The likelihood is small, but the list of possible complications is lengthy.
What if the scar heals horribly and I look like frankenstein?
What if all goes well but pathology shows it's cancer?
What if the surgery is ok but the recovery is horrible?
I need this to be over. Better yet, I need it to not be happening.
Please think of me today and send me your most positive thoughts. Your good vibes have seen the boys through some very dark times, so I'm counting on them for me this time.
I'm supposed to be home later in the evening but I'm packing a bag just in case. Just being prepared.
We'll keep you posted...